Last weekend, I went to my home town, to attend the surprise 40th birthday of one of my school friends sister. She was (and still is) older than us and I can remember her beating me up when I was younger and so it was lovely to see her with a husband and teenage children of her own now.
While we were there, my friend and I were talking about how our Dads used to huddle together throughout each winter when we were kids, watching us play football. My friend's Dad used to chain smoke cigarettes. ...
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May 15th, 2012 in
Self Improvement
We hear so much about forgiveness, in our churches, on Oprah, in
new age magazines, but do we truly understand what the big deal
about forgiveness is? We read that if we forgive others and
ourselves we are doing our spiritual work and becoming better
people, but what does that mean to us? You can forgive that guy
you dated a while back until you run into him someplace and then
you want to wreak revenge on him. You can forgive your parents
for your horrible childhood but as soon as you get on ...
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May 14th, 2012 in
Spirituality
It is amazing how many folks mention after reading "The Four
Agreements" by don Miguel Ruiz, that the first agreement (be
impeccable with your word) doesn't seem to be as difficult as
the second or third agreements (don't take anything personally
and never make assumptions). They say, "Sure, I can stop
gossiping or be careful to speak more kindly when I am
communicating, but not taking anything personally or making
assumptions....well that's really difficult!" Personally, I
think the first ...
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May 11th, 2012 in
Spirituality
The most elusive quality of excellence, of peak performers
worldwide and throughout history is that thing called "Mastery."
What is this thing, and is it possible for ordinary people,
however committed, to touch this exalted state?
The answer is "yes," but I've got good news, bad news, and more
good news. The first good news is that the path is deceptively
simple. The bad news is that it is hard, and can be painful. The
last, good news is that those on the path have no real
competition--very ...
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May 6th, 2012 in
Self Improvement
I recently spent an afternoon with one of the people who's made
a profound and lasting difference in my life over the past 11
years as Edwene Gaines conducted a workshop on integrity at our
local Unity Center. I love how Edwene introduces herself: "I am
a woman of power." She then goes on to share that, as a Unity
minister, she has dedicated her life to the transformation of
the abundance consciousness of planet Earth.
At the end of the workshop one of my friends, who had recently
met Edwene, ...
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April 21st, 2012 in
Self Improvement
Sarah Wilson, a dog trainer, was recently interviewed in a
magazine article in reference to her master's thesis which is
about women and their dogs. She feels that what women are
intuitively attracted to in a dog are the same things she'll
enjoy in a mate. (I'm sure this applies to men as well, but
she's studying women.) Why would you choose a live-in companion
you're incompatible with?
Wilson surveyed a lot of women and found they described their
men and their dogs similarly. She described ...
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April 14th, 2012 in
Self Improvement
Most people look outside of themselves as the cause of their
unhappiness or frustration. After all, wouldn't life be
practically perfect if the significant people in our lives would
simply do things the way we want them to or do what we think is
best for them? Actually, this is the kind of thinking that
perpetuates the misery!
I agree that most of today's unhappiness centers on important
people in our lives not cooperating with us. Can anyone relate
to that? Have you ever had a child who makes ...
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March 29th, 2012 in
Self Improvement
We aren't born knowing how to talk. Nor are we born knowing how
to make conversation. It's not a science, where we can memorize
rules. It's an art, where we must intuit the rules.
One good way to learn to become a good conversationalist is to
study someone who is. Another is to work with a coach.
It's a combination of being present and engaged; having the
non-verbals under control; being truly interested in the other
people and curious about them; taking responsibility for holding
up your end ...
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March 24th, 2012 in
Self Improvement
Much of my initial work as a hypnotherapist is to dispel some of
the myths about hypnosis. Many people, even when they come in to
see me, have a lot of misconceptions about the process. They
think I'm going to wave my hand in front of their face, and
they'll go into never-never land. Then they think I'm going to
take control of their mind, and erase all their problems in one
session. Some people want me to do this, and some are afraid of
having me in control. So the first thing I do is explain ...
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March 17th, 2012 in
Self Improvement
"Why am I not happy?" "Why is life a struggle?" "Why doesn't
work, work?" We probe our soul with questions like these, but we
will never hear the answers if we don't take time off in our
hectic days to listen. Unless we slow down and take a deep
breath, we cannot hear the subtle responses that come from
within.
As we get older, the questions about the nature and quality of
life come up. By then, though, we are so mired in the car
payments and the mortgage and the daily routine, and we are ...
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March 4th, 2012 in
Self Improvement